Is it really already Time for another stupid newsletter ???
It’s time that old hippie got a life…….
or a hobby or a girlfriend, or something
he’s obviously got too much time on his hands
Hobby? Girlfriend?  Well maybe, but that’s a discussion for another time another place.
If these stupid newsletters seem wordier and more frequent – you have no one to blame but yourselves.  The overwhelmingly positive response and the many, many requests for recipes have me all pumped up.  I started this deal as a way to cut down on the amount of time I spent dealing with individual requests for salsa recipes.  I figured just do one a month and get it out of the way.  It’s grown and grown until I’m now spending 2 or 3 hours a day answering your mail …………. and lovin’ it.  I have come to realize that through all the years of craziness I really have picked up some tricks and a philosophy and some stories that folks enjoy hearing about.  So, until I find that hobby………or that rich widow lady shows up, you’re just gonna have to put up with my rantings.  I try  to answer all email question and requests  – so if you wrote me and have not received a response.  I’m blaming my computer, so write me again.   I’ll get back to you.  This time around I’m gonna stick with some of the old favorites that the “celebrity chef’s” ignore, but that I remember and love.  American food – nothing fancy – good though ………..and really easy to prepare.  First we have the real deal.  A truly American dish that was loved by most everybody until it got lost in the rush to new, hip, fancier French dishes started by Julia Child  and taken to ridiculous extremes by that band of silly charlatans calling themselves ‘Celebrity Chefs’.  Speaking of whom; have you noticed that they have started showing up on each others TV shows with alarming regularity.  It’s like some sick incestuous relationship that my youngest son refers to as ‘a self-congratulatory circle-jerk’.  Got a nice way with words, eh?  Wish I’da said that.  I don’t think any one of these morons has ever had an original thought in their life.  Is it merely a coincidence that they all start pushing the same thing at the same time?  Or is it just another case of monkey see – monkey do’. For a while it was balsamic vinegar – every show used it in every recipe.    I have a vision of all the ‘celebrity chefs kicking back in the green room after they shoot their shows.   All laughing as Emeril says ‘okay they fell for the balsamic vinegar let’s see if we can get them on the ‘chanterelles’”. Then it was the mushroom of the week….if you weren’t eating chanterelles at least twice a week you were obviously some sort of food Neanderthal.  Then for a long time it was shitake mushrooms and chanterelles were so ‘yesterday’. I’m not sure what kind of mushroom I’m supposed to be eating this week. Right now those silly fools would have you believe it impossible to make anything good without at least 3 kinds of olive oil close at hand.   At least their ardor for arugula seems to have cooled and it’s once again okay to eat a lettuce salad.  We seem to have made it through the chipotle scare as well.  There’s still a lot of things they manage to annoy me with but at the top of my list is “al dente”.  You cannot watch a cooking show without hearing the head buffoon saying “al dente” at least three times.  Okay, OKAY, we get the picture. I’d like to be the first to tell you that “al dente” simply means ‘not mushy’ and I think most of us already knew that if the pasta or veggies were mushy we overcooked them….WELL EXCUUUUSE ME!! Here’s a little story to illustrate just how much influence this band-a-loons has.  I was part of a group at a dinner celebrating a wedding at a rather pricey and pretentious place here in Cabo.  When our food arrived I could hear some appreciative and knowing remarks all saying something like “mmmmmm, ‘al dente’, just the way I like it.  I dug into my over-priced plate of spaghetti and meat balls and when I bit down you could actually hear the pasta crunch – it was almost uncooked – just in the water long enough so it would sorta bend..  So while everyone else is showing how hip they were by parroting the phrase ‘al dente’ and eating crunchy pasta, I called the waiter over and told him to take my plate back to the kitchen and bring me some cooked spaghetti.  I think all the rest of the guests were a little embarrassed by my effrontery, but I was the only one at the table to get cooked pasta.  Before we left, the owner came over and apologized and thanked me for letting the kitchen know about the terrible mistake.  Remember that we in the kitchen cannot possibly taste every item on every plate – so we count on you to keep us honest.  We’re really no different than every one else.  If we can get away with something……. we will.  So the next time you get a serving of little julienned mixed veggies that are crunchy and cold in the middle or some tough, chewy, pasta send it back.  We don’t like it - but it keeps us on our toes.  After the last Newsletter I got a number of emails asking if that was really my picture at the top.  Yes it is, but in all honesty I have to admit I’m really not that pretty.  My son took the photo and kindly air-brushed out the tattoos and warts, and he took the picture on a day when I had my teeth in and was wearing my toupee. The shot was part of his effort to sell a cooking show called ‘In the Kitchen with Charles Manson’  or maybe just ‘Cookin’ with Charlie’  There was some interest but nothing came of it.  If any of you really need to see what I look like without all the makeup – you could go to the food channel web page by clicking here.  Okay, to the recipe.
 

Whew!  I really thought he got stoned and forgot this was all about cooking

Up at the top I promised you a real all –American dish.  Well this dish was created by none other than Thomas Jefferson, a famous 18th century chef - who in his spare time also wrote the declaration of Independence and served as President of these United States. He passed away on the 4th of July and you just don’t get much more American than ol’ Tom.  This rich, creamy, tasty, dish - quick and easy to prepare - is about as American as it gets.  Yes, buckaroos and buckerettes - I’m talking about macaroni and cheese. The definitive comfort food, a once proud dish that was so trashed and ridiculed by the elitist foodies that many of us quit cooking it and were slightly embarrassed to admit to even liking it.  When we thought no one was looking we’d sneak a box of that Kraft junk into our cart and avoid eye contact as the checker rang it up.  No more sneaking around.  No, were gonna return the venerable Mac & Cheese to its rightful place – front and center in the pantheon of great American dishes.  This dish is almost as easy to prepare from scratch as it is to use a box of that chemical laden artificially colored super market junk.  Here’s how I do it – er, uhm………actually - this is how my mom did it (and probably Thomas Jefferson too).  

Parts list

Cooked macaroni………………. I use a small elbow macaroni, but you can use virtually any shape or size.  You don’t want to over-cook the pasta because it’s going to spend some time in the oven, and nobody likes mushy Mac & Cheese!  So you want the pasta – dare I say it? –‘al dente’.  

Grated cheese…………………… Once again, the choice is yours.  I use a sharp yellow cheddar. Sharp because I like the taste and yellow because I like the way it looks when it browns and crusts up on top.  I grate my own cheese but if you want to buy a pack of pre-grated stuff – I won’t tell. You can use whatever cheese you fancy and if you find something that tastes real good – let me know and I’ll try it.

Bread crumbs……………………… Make your own or buy a pack.  Plain, seasoned, cheap or expensive, they all work.

White liquid……………………….. my mom just used milk and beaten egg -1 egg to each 2 cups of milk.  I use a white sauce that I make by cooking just one teaspoon of white flour  in an equal amount of butter – stirring constantly over low flame, because I want to cook away the raw flour taste but I don’t want to brown it.  Then add the egg and milk mix and keep stirring until it comes up to a simmer and thickens a bit. Turn it off and set it aside for a minute.

Chopped parsley…………………. My mom never used parsley but I really like it.

WARNING  - if you’re dealing with young kids of Mac & cheese purists you may get some complaints –‘ yech, there’s green stuff in my macaroni’ – so watch it.!

Butter……………………………….. I’m not really sure you need the butter – my mom didn’t use it, but I put butter in most everything and claim it’s wonderful

Optional stuff……………………… there’s a whole lot of other stuff you can add, and I’ll list them at the bottom,  but you should probably make this traditional version at least once before you start fooling around with any fancy touches.

Here’s how you put it together

Rub/smear some butter on the bottom and sides of an oven proof container of some sort.  I use an ordinary Pyrex casserole. Put a layer of the cooked macaroni on the bottom and sprinkle a layer of grated cheese on top of it – I also lightly salt and pepper and dot each layer with a little butter as I go along.  You can sprinkle in some parsley at this time as well. Then add another layer of macaroni and more cheese and salt and pepper.  Keep adding layers until you get to just below the top of the dish. Now add the milk-egg mix filling the dish to just below the top layer of pasta.  Top it off with some more cheese and a generous sprinkling of bread crumbs.  You’ve actually just made a homemade version of Thomas Jefferson’s masterpiece.  All you do now is stick it in a medium oven (350-375) until it’s nice and golden brown on top.  Take note of a few things to remember the next time you make it.  If you’d like it more liquidy don’t use the butter/flour – if you’d like it less liquidy use more butter/four? Too Cheesy? Use less cheese.  Too crusty? Take it out of the oven sooner.  Not crusty enough?  Hell, leave it in longer.  And those optional ingredients I said I’d mention?  Cooked broccoli goes well in the noodles.  Also try some leftover chicken or add a can of tuna and call it ‘Aunt Minnie’s’ original creamy tuna cheddar pasta casserole. Maybe some chopped cooked red or green bell pepper or even some mild chiles. A can of stewed tomatoes would probably be good too.  Or add layers of your spaghetti meat sauce and call it ‘Thomas Jefferson’s Authentic Minute man Revolutionary War Style American Macaroni Lasagna’  or throw the milk/egg mix into the blender with a canned Chipotle and some of the juice from the pan and call it Macaroni and Cheese in a spicy Pink Chipotle Salsa.

Let me know how it turns out.
Spencer